Best Part Time Jobs

Part time jobs are tempting, especially in today’s marketplace with ever increasing stress in full time jobs. And you get to be your own boss, deciding when to work and when not. However, you also need to be a salesmen, because you will have to sell your services in the first place.

The 10 best part-time jobs all have one thing in common: they require less time than a full-time job.

1.     Part-Time Workout Instructor Ever watched those workout instructors at the gym? Standing next to some poor dude or gal, screaming at her and make her/him sweat. Hell I can do that and get paid for it.

2.     Part-Time Consultant Many of the best part-time jobs are relatively fuzzy in the job description department. And nothing is fuzzier than “consulting.” What does it even mean? No one knows. Consult away, friend!

3.     Part-Time Assassin Assassination is a tough gig, but it has its share of advantages as well. For one, you pretty much get to be your own boss. You set the schedule, decide when and when not to work, etc, which alone makes it one of the best part-time jobs you could have. But there’s more – you get to dress like a bad ass and there’s a chance you could have an inappropriate relationship with a very young nice chick.

4.     Part-Time Squirrel Just dress up like a squirrel for a couple hours at a time and stand at the intersection. There must be a market for this somewhere.

5.     Part-Time Hero The best part-time jobs have some degree of prestige to make up for the relatively low pay. Part-time super heroics give you this in spades. If there’s something more prestigious and worthy of respect than a cape, we don’t know what it is.

6.     Part-Time Dickhead Unlike many of the other best part-time jobs, you may not have heard of this one before. Basically, an individual will pay you to act like a dickhead for a modest hourly rate. It’s good work if you can get it.

7.     Part-Time Firefighter There’s nothing more rewarding than fighting fires. But who has the time to do it 40 hours a week? No, what you need is to fight fires on your own schedule. Which brings us to the next best part-time job:

8.     Part-Time Arsonist As a part-time firefighter, you might need to drum up a little extra business. This is where part-time arson comes in. Setting fires is fun.

9.     Part-Time Female Body Inspector You know, like that one standing at the bar entrance and decide which one can get in.

10.    Part-Time Bodybuilder Many of the best part-time jobs have immense personal benefits, like getting totally jacked. So don’t forget to carb up and get to those weights.

Original  List:  (AGE 20)

1. Handsome
2. Charming
3. Financially successful
4. A caring listener
5. Witty
6. In good shape
7. Dresses with style
8. Appreciates finer thing
9. Full of thoughtful surprises
10. An imaginative, romantic lover

What  I Want in a Man, Revised List (age 32)

1. Nice looking
2. Opens car doors, holds chairs
3. Has enough money for a nice dinner
4. Listens more than talks
5. Laughs at my jokes
6. Carries bags of groceries with ease
7. Owns at least one tie
8. Appreciates a good home-cooked meal (pizza, chinese)
9. Remembers birthdays and anniversaries
10. Seeks romance at least once a week

What  I Want in a Man, Revised List (age 42)

1.  Not too ugly
2.  Doesn’t drive off until I’m in the car
3.  Works steady – splurges on dinner out occasionally
4.  Nods head when I’m talking
5.  Usually remembers punch lines of jokes
6.  Is in good enough  shape to rearrange the furniture
7.  Wears a shirt that covers his stomach
8.  Knows not to buy champagne with screw-top lids
9.  Remembers to  put the toilet seat down
10. Shaves most weekends

What  I Want in a Man, Revised List (age 52)

.  Keeps hair in nose and ears trimmed
2.  Doesn’t belch or scratch in public
3.  Doesn’t borrow money too often
4.  Doesn’t nod off to sleep when  I’m venting
5.  Doesn’t re-tell the same joke too many times
6.  Is in good enough shape to get off the couch on weekends
7.  Usually wears matching socks and fresh underwear
8.  Appreciates a good TV dinner
9.  Remembers your name on occasion
10. Shaves some weekends

What  I Want in a Man, Revised List (age 62)

1.  Doesn’t scare small children
2.  Remembers where bathroom is
3.  Doesn’t require much money for upkeep
4.  Only snores lightly when asleep
5.  Remembers why he’s laughing
6.  Is in good enough shape to stand up by himself
7.  Usually wears some clothes
8.  Likes soft foods
9.  Remembers  where he left his teeth
10. Remembers that it’s the weekend

What  I Want in a Man, Revised List (age 72)

1. Breathing
2.  Doesn’t miss the toilet.